Who’s Watching the Watchers?

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Since May is Mental Health Month and I have been ruminating about this for a while, I just thought I would share something that is near and dear to me. I think we have a problem in this country (the US) with mental health care. Not just for adults, but especially for children. I have seen first-hand the abuse perpetrated by some of the “caregivers” of my child, Child #3, who has been to mental hospitals six times.

I’m done sitting by and being silent. Screw that! What is that quote: “All that is needed for evil to flourish is for good men to do nothing?” Yeah. I’m tired of doing nothing. My child was abused by these so-called “caregivers!” Incensed? I was too. Here is the story.

The first episode of Child #3 being admitted to a mental hospital happened when he was just 12. He was a young 12, actually only mentally 6, which I did not know at the time. I had taken him to a nearby hospital West of us for cuts that Child #1 had discovered on him. I was treated at the hospital like I was a horrible mother for not knowing what to do with this child. Why hadn’t I done something? Um…hello? Because I don’t know what to freaking do!!! What do you do when your child is so unhappy that they cut lines in their bodies and horrify you with the blood? This was not just for attention. This was a problem.

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Thus started our mental health journey. That same night, Child #3 was admitted to a mental hospital in Racine, Wisconsin, about an hour and a half from our home. It was 2:30 in the morning when the ambulance brought him in and I was told to get into the ambulance in the parking lot and ride over with them since the area wasn’t safe, a luxury I was not afforded on the trip out. Wonderful! This is where you want to house my child? So, I got him signed in, amid struggles and tears. He had never been away from home and was absolutely terrified. I was reassured by the nurses that everything would be fine. They implied that I was a helicopter mom. No. But this is my very scared child whom you do not know and he is desperate for me.

I went to see him every day. The first day, he stumbled three times on the way to the door where I would come in. What? Turns out he had an allergic reaction to the medication Seroquel, one where he lost muscle control and his tongue swelled up. I absolutely forbade the nurses to give it to him again. They administered it the next night. I was livid when I found out. He had even questioned them, but was told “We’re not going to do this!” in a threatening tone. There was next to nothing I could do. They were just trying to keep him quiet so their jobs would be easier.

In fact, one nurse, Anna (they’re not supposed to know the nurses names, but he overheard someone call her that) told him to think about how her parents had died when she was a child, so that she thought he would stop sobbing and shut up! Unreal! This is the same nurse who was so pleasant and loving to my face! How can you abuse my child, who is in your care, like that? She just added to his trauma!

Act out? We’ll calm you down!
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He was able to leave after just three days, thank God, and I took him home. The problem was, his psychiatrist was trying to figure out medications for him. So, with each new change, many behavioral problems surfaced. He was violent with us. Many, many times the police were called (by us) for protection and help. Unfortunately, this just labeled him a “problem child.” It was even suggested to me, by the police, that I should put him in a home! Over my dead body! He is only mentally six, though he is very tall and imposing.

After that came another trip to another mental hospital, this one in Green Bay. They were not great to him there either, and I could not visit him often because of the distance. He lost weight there and was feeling better about his body, but then they wouldn’t release him until he gained the weight back. He had been overweight before, but they held it over him until he gained it back. Only then was he released. He has never lost the weight again.

There is nothing like hearing the screams of your child down the corridors of your local hospital and know that it is taking six police officers to hold him down because he is in such agony. My heart breaks every time I think about it. They wouldn’t let me back there. He desperately didn’t want to be shipped to the mental hospital. So much trauma. He was terrified. He just wanted his mom. He just wanted for this nightmare to be over.
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The third through sixth times Child #3 was in a mental hospital was in Milwaukee. Unfortunately, Rogers would never take him. I’m not sure why. I have heard many, many excuses, but he’s never been allowed to be treated there. So, he got shipped to another one. I think it’s the best one he’s been to, but it still was abusive and awful. How is this helping him? How does this help any child who suffers from mental illness?

Child #3 has suffered enough trauma at the hands of his father. Things most people only hear about on graphic TV dramas. The fact that he suffered more in places that were supposed to help him, just makes me boiling mad! And this doesn’t even touch the group home where he was sexually assaulted by his roommate and made to eat gluten or starve by the head of that house, who verbally abused all of the “inmates.” Yes. I use the word inmates. That’s what they are.

All I can say is “God saw.” You evil, evil people who perpetrate these crimes against our children and cower in your darkness – God sees all you do! Ever wonder why no cameras or recording devices are allowed in mental hospitals? Pretty convenient, right?

God sees everywhere, not just in church! Walk upright in the truth and be kind.
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Now, I am not saying that all mental hospitals are bad. I’m sure there must be some that are what they are supposed to be. In our experience, though, we have yet to see one. Please, take a terrified, six-year-old child, drug them, abuse them, and take away all their family. That’s the right way to treat the mentally ill! I refuse to send Child #3 back to one. We will help him with coping skills and his therapists and other workers that we have amassed over the last four years. Never will I send him back for more abuse! It just makes his life that much more unbearable.

So, what are we doing now? I have been experimenting with various essential oils from Young Living and some are really helping him. It isn’t perfect by any stretch of the imagination. There are ups and downs. However, it is so much better. He has his schedule and his people and his oils. It works. I am hoping to try the trauma releasing sleep kit soon. It’s pricey, but I’ve heard worth every penny. I would do anything (Well, almost. Nothing illegal or immoral, please!) to help my kiddos. If Child #3 could release all, or even some of the trauma that he’s been through, he might actually have a chance at a happy life. That is my prayer.

This is the kit I’m thinking about ordering from Young Living.

If you are interested in ordering anything from Young Living, please use my link! Thanks, everyone!

https://www.youngliving.com/us/en/referral/31628184

Challenges

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Today was not a great day. I had high hopes for it, but alas, here we are. I got super frustrated when I got more unhelpful advice regarding our housing situation. Then, I was going to take Child #3 to get blood work done at the hospital when I looked over at his legs and realized that he had cut them up terribly. Wonderful! So, if I took him to the hospital for the blood work, they would ship him off to the mental hospital.

So, off to the local Goodwill to donate more items from our over-crowded house instead. This particular store is just two towns East of home.

When we arrived there was no one out there to help me. So I started unloading my own stuff. After a couple bags, I got a cart. I had filled it to the top and traded it for another empty cart by the time an employee came out to yell at me that they wouldn’t accept the shelf that I had brought.

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I shot back at him that if someone had been out there to help me, he could have told me that before I took it out of the car! He wasn’t really interested in helping me, and I wasn’t thrilled with him. He tried to excuse himself by telling me that he was so far away, but I cut him off again and told him that I didn’t care. He was so nasty, and to someone who was donating things for the store to sell and make money! All for free! Do you really want to offend someone who is helping you? Then he went on to help another lady, whom he actually asked if he could help! 😡!!!

Why oh why does the world seem to be full of incompetent jerks today?

I’m hoping for a better tomorrow. It is, after all, my birthday.

A birthday cake. Not mine, but you get the idea.

Child #2’s Chimichangas

Yummy chimichangas!

Yesterday, as you may know, was Cinco de Mayo, or Mexican independence day. We, in the states, tend to celebrate it too. Hey, it’s another reason to party, people! So, Child #3 decided that she would make chimichangas. She has been perfecting this recipe for a while now, and I’ll tell you, they are awesome! Thankfully, this recipe makes enough for leftovers (yay, lunch!!!) So, here it is:

Protein Mixture – beef, refried beans, tomato sauce, and spices!

Protein Mixture Ingredients

1 pound lean ground beef

1/2 cup finely chopped onion

1, 16 oz. can refried beans

1, 8 oz. can tomato sauce

2 tsp. chili powder

1 tsp. minced garlic (fresh or jarred, though she used jarred)

1/2 tsp. ground cumin

Fresh salsa sauce!

Sauce Ingredients

1, 4 oz. can chopped green chilies

1, 4 oz. can chopped jalapeno peppers

2, 8 oz. cans tomato sauce

1 tsp. cumin

1 tsp. salt

1 tsp. chili powder

Ok, so we had to use crumbles, but they worked!

Other Ingredients

Your favorite gf non-stick cooking spray

18, 6″ corn tortillas (approximately)

1 1/2 cups shredded cheddar cheese

Directions – Protein Mixture

Preheat your oven to 350° F. Cook beef with onion on medium heat in a large frying pan. When beef is cooked through and onions are soft add refried beans and chili powder, garlic, cumin and can of tomato sauce. Stir to combine and warm through.

Directions – Sauce

In a medium-sized bowl mix the 2 cans of tomato sauce, the green chilies, and the jalapeno peppers. To this add the cumin, salt, and chili powder. Set aside.

Directions – Putting It All Together

Spray a 9″ x 13″ pan with your favorite gf cooking spray. One tortilla at a time, add enough protein mixture to fill, but not overfill said tortilla (about 2 Tbsp.) Top with about 1 Tbsp. of the sauce. Add a sprinkle of the cheddar cheese to the tortilla filling. Place in pan and have someone else with impeccably clean hands hold it in place while you work on the next tortilla. Continue until you have filled your pan. Sprinkle the leftover cheese on top of the pan of chimichangas and slide into the preheated oven. Bake for about 30 minutes or until the tortillas are crispy and the cheese is melted. Enjoy!

Vegan or Vegetarian Note: If you want to make this vegetarian or vegan you could substitute diced mushrooms for the beef, or a can (16 oz.) of kidney beans. As for the cheese, you could try vegan cheese if you so require. Either way, the spices should make however you make it delicious!

A Rainbow Promise & Chocolate Sauce

A rainbow with the storm clearing…such a sign for God’s everlasting promise!

The other day we had a pretty strong storm here in Wisconsin. However, when the clouds moved East, the sun shined in the West and a beautiful rainbow appeared. It reminded me of that very first rainbow and the promise that went along with it. God has not abandoned us, even though the mortgage company is being oh so difficult. God has us.

So, the chocolate sauce. My oldest had brought me a semi-sweet chocolate bar. I am not a huge semi-sweet chocolate person, but thought that I would make my famous homemade chocolate sauce. My mom used to make a version of this when I was a kid and it never failed to dress up plain ice cream in the most delightful way.

Such a special dessert!

Chocolate Sauce

1, 4.3 oz. semi-sweet chocolate bar (or a rounded 1/2 cup of chocolate chips works too!)

1 Tbsp. butter

3 Tbsp. milk

Just starting out in my saucepan.

In a small saucepan (yes, on that thing we call the stove! Though you can use the microwave – just heat, stirring every 30 seconds, until melted and stir together.) melt butter and chocolate in the milk, stirring frequently (or constantly!) until all is melted and combined. Pour over your favorite ice cream and enjoy. Serves 4. Sorry, Child #1! You were at work!

Can’t you just smell that chocolatey goodness?

NOTE: Please keep praying for us! We are now having trouble having the mortgage company accept the buyer’s money to buy our house. It’s asinine. I know God has a purpose for this and He will use all things for good, but with the mortgage sale coming up on Thursday, I’m really trying to not let my anxiety get the better of me!

Good News!

Ha ha! Gotcha! You didn’t think my house looked like this, did you?
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I was able to sell my house! Yay! What a relief! I contacted a couple of companies who buy homes to fix up and flip. The first one was a bust, but the second gentleman bought the house! So, we have about a month of crazy, frantic packing, etc. and then we will bid our old home adieu!

Thanks, everyone, for all of the prayers. They really do change things, don’t they? May God bless you all! And keep those prayers coming, if you please!

Do we know to where we are moving? Of course not! What, did you think I have this all planned out and organized? But, my friends, God is so good! I will be able to leave our village without a foreclosure sale on my record. Yay!

And bonus…my not so nice (read horrifying!) neighbors will not be my neighbors any longer! YAY!!!!

Now…about that place to live, God?

Tasty Chicken Stew

So hungry now!!!!

I made this stew a few weeks back, and it turned out awesome. I wasn’t sure, because I’ve never had much luck with chicken stew, but this one’s a winner.

Ingredients:

2 lbs. (or so) boneless, skinless chicken thighs

4 large potatoes, peeled and quartered

2 lbs. carrots (I used regular carrots, peeled and cut into 3″ pieces, but you could use baby carrots)

Salt and pepper to taste (I just took my handy salt-pepper shaker and shook it a few times over the meal)

8 oz. Italian dressing

Your favorite nonstick spray

Directions:

Spray your pan (I used a Dutch oven) with your cooking spray. Add chicken, potatoes, and carrots. Season with salt and pepper. Pour the Italian dressing over all of it. Cover and bake at 350°F for 45 minutes or until chicken reaches 165° F and potatoes and carrots can be pierced through with a knife. Enjoy!

Hope Update: I am trying to find a buyer for our home so that we can stop the auction and have a little time to move. Please pray for this and pray for a good home for us too! Thanks, guys!

An Update

Is it Spring yet?
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Ah, my friends it has been too long! I just wanted to update you on why it has been so long! As you may or may not know, I broke three toes on my right foot about 2.5 weeks ago. Yeah, I’m THAT graceful! I tripped, went down and when I was finally able to get upright, I could no longer walk on my right foot – too painful!

So, it has been an interesting journey! Do you ever feel as if God is against you? In my heart, I know He’s not, but on that Sunday morning, it sure felt like it. It even felt more like it two days later when I came down with some horrible gastrointestinal bug. It was horrible (I will spare you the grisly details!) and all five of us had it. It was a well-traveled bug.

Lovely!
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I am slowly getting back to the fact that I can eat again, though my symptoms have disappeared, I am somewhat gun shy, as you might expect. That area is going well, though my foot still throbs from time to time and I still have to hobble around on my crutches. Time is the great healer, for broken bones at least. I am fortunate that I am not a marathon runner, or my podiatrist would have wanted me to have foot surgery. When she asked about it (since I had a 50/50 chance of needing it or not) I felt my eyes get large and my head shook from side to side. Uh-uh!!!!

It has been most difficult staying put and healing, though not that difficult when I had the GI bug. Who wants to go anywhere with that malady? Yuck! I have had to relearn patience and let others do for me, which about kills me (though my children would disagree!) I am tired, but also resting in God’s love.

Looks like a happy place, doesn’t it?
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I am trying to work out a solution to our housing issue. Please continue to send your prayers at this very difficult time (regarding housing and anything else you want to throw in there – we can use all the help we can get!!!) and we will watch how God works.

Thanks and God bless,

Rita

Vanity Pancakes

Hungry?

Every once in a while we have breakfast for dinner. This is especially popular during Fridays in Lent, when we do not eat meat. Yesterday, Child #2 decided to make vanity pancakes.

Vanity pancakes are light and fluffy. We generally make at least a double batch, since a single batch makes 20, 6″ pancakes. These are great as leftovers, or to be frozen for future use. Once you have poured some on your griddle, you may then place a few chocolate chips, blueberries, or your favorite treat in each pancake. Do not add the treats to the batter! They will stick and burn to your pan!

Mix together:

2 cups sweet sorghum flour                                        In a Separate Small Bowl Mix:

1 cup coconut powder                                                2 Tbsp. baking powder          

2 tsp. sugar                                                                  2 tsp. apple cider vinegar

1 tsp. salt                                                                     2 tsp. water

2 eggs                                           Add to first mixture

2 cups milk

6 Tbsp. canola oil

12 oz. sour cream

Combine all ingredients in first list in a large mixing bowl and mix until well blended.  Add baking powder mixture and stir in on low speed until incorporated.  Drop batter onto a well-greased, 325℉ griddle or frying pan.  Add any desired “extras” at this point. Cook until bubbles form and edges look firm (3 – 5 minutes.)  Flip and cook for another minute until second side is golden.  Makes 20, 6” pancakes.

Serving suggestions: Butter, syrup, jam, honey, etc.

Note: For our vanity pancakes, Child #2 added a few semi-sweet chocolate chips after dropping the batter onto the hot griddle. After they were cooked on both sides, she topped them with butter and tart cherry jam. Yummy!

Note #2: If you would like to make these vegetarian or vegan, the substitutions that can be made are as follows:

2 eggs = 2 Tbsp. flax seed meal and 6 Tbsp. warm water (mix separately in a small bowl and add after baking powder mixture)

2 cups milk = 2 cups almond milk

12 oz. sour cream = 12 oz. soy yogurt

Enjoy!